Atlas, STAY THERE! For real

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The best thing I have seen all month.

After much consternation and gnashing of teeth, I finally get my stuff. Jesus, you never know how much stuff you have till you see it in one place.

You ever notice how their stuff is shit, and your shit is stuff.

I suppose you never know how much of it you have until you see it in boxes. This is where the house stood at the end of the day:

A few more thoughts from the day:

  • People who do these sort of long haul drives have ACTUALLY been everywhere. The driver knew where Raceland, LA was. He apparently had made a delivery to Thibodaux.
  • We had two items of damage: 1) One of Heather’s rugs (not pictured) was soaked through. A hole in the truck apparently. It had been wet for a day or two. Smells of mildew. 2) One 1cm scratch in the floor. Atlas is going to make both right. And truthfully, in the grand scheme of things. Getting my stuff from California to Georgia and thats all we have, thats not bad at all.
  • Heather and I are too lazy/busy to be able to unpack the whole house. Crew coming in for that this weekend. We expect our first night in the house to be Sunday night.
  • If you notice from the top picture, the Sotherby’s For Sale sign is still up. I had two separate people come to the house asking when we were moving out. I had to explain, “No dude, we bought this.” My realtor is pissed. Supposedly, the selling realtor will take care of it. We will see.

Final exhausted thought on the day: Our new house already feels like home. I’m really tired of doing the vagabond thing. Feels like we are travelling to nowhere (road to nowhere). But, we are finally getting to stay put in an incredible place. I am so excited to settle in.

That’s all for now, I am going to get some sleep.

The Madhouse Continues

Oh boy, faithful readers. The following has happened since my last post:

  • Ethan got Conjunctivitis, on the day that I was supposed to get all of my services activated, and the stuff moved out of this house. As a result (1) the stuff didn’t get moved out and (2) I missed my Comcast appointment.
  • Ethan then got a Sinus Infection. Our doctor is much more astute than I am. He looked at Ethan and said, “I’m going to give you a script for amoxicillin too, but wait till he breaks a fever. Then, get it filled and start giving it to him. Sure enough, he broke a fever 24 hours later.
  • I managed to get a Comcast appointment, so I now have internet in the new place.
  • Had our first meal in the new house, which consisted of McD

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  • The truck with our stuff is leaving New Orleans today. It will be in GA tonight, and will meet me at the house tomorrow.

I should have an update about that tomorrow, and in addition, I have a few other Georgia oddities I want to write about. Until then faithful readers, stay frosty.

A Quick One, While We Wait or Our number just got called in Purgatory

Just some quick updates for you, faithful readers.

  • Heather started her job. They wanted her for her trial skills, and man that is going into full use. Basically starting her new gig at lightspeed. Its good, but busy.
  • I think the Georgia weather agrees with Ethan. *knocks on wood* He hasn’t been sick since the mega drive, and I am convinced he caught something on that plane. Completely different than the warhellride that was last year at this time.
  • We took Ethan to the new house, and he flipped out. He loves it. Ran around the yard, ran around the interior. Played with the toys he brought. In fact, when it was time to leave, he cried and cried. I turned to Heather and I said, “Did we ever buy the right house or what”
  • Timeline works like this: Feb 14 (Valentines) –  we close on the house, Feb 15 – The stuff from here gets moved in, plus full cleaning and carpet shampoo, PLUS a bunch of other things.
  • Our stuff from California has been put on an Atlas Van Lines rig, headed to the east coast. Has two stops to make, then us. Feb 21 or 22nd, our stuff gets put in the new house.
  • By the end of the month, we are fully out of the in laws house and in our new digs. And I cannot wait.

Thats all the updates for now. More as they come. Expect some pics this week.

The Flavors of East Georgia & Muscadine

With the local team in the super ball, I decided to partake of some more Georgia Vintages. 


After the rampant popularity of the last post, I decided to embark on more adventures in Georgia wine.

So, I drive out to my local “package store” as they say in this part of the world. They carry a ton of wine, liquor, beer etc. They got both Abita Turbodog and Talisker.

I figure they got to have Georgia wine. I dig around their wine selection. Don’t see anything marked “local.” So, I ask the clerk. The clerk goes, “Hmmmm, no one has ever asked me for Georgia wine. Let me get our wine guy”

Out comes the wine guy. I ask him, “Where is the Georgia wine?” He says, “Oh man, all that stuff is terrible.” I say, “Really?” He goes, “Look, people come in here for one of two things. Cheap stuff, which we got a ton of. Or top shelf stuff. We got $1,000 a bottle Chateauneuf du Pape in here. But, no one wants overpriced, terrible wine. Which is what most Georgia stuff is. If you want to try it, you have to go to Total Wine.

Undeterred, I go to Total Wine. I find their wine guy (I am sure he would prefer Sommelier), and he takes me to the Georgia wine selections, which, I shit you not, is right next to the Trump Wine. He asks me what do I like in a wine. I say my usual answer which is, “Dry red that hits you like a truck”

He sighs, “The only thing you are going to get is this,” and hands me one of the bottles I will review below. Then i say, “What about something more typical of Georgia wine” and he hands me another bottle.


Chateau Elan 2013 Cabernet Sauvignon Reserve

For non Georgian’s, Chateau Elan is this snooty golf course/spa/resort situation east of Atlanta. Heather’s dad has played golf at their 3(!) courses.

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Apparently, has grapes too. 

Another fun fact, the fuckin grapes in this wine weren’t even grown in Georgia. Yuba, CA. Bullshit. This is total bullshit.

Why even do this. Why make wine where you got to source the grapes from clear across the god damn country? Makes no sense.

So, technically, the wine has some legs, but almost no nose to speak of.

To say this thing has a taste or a finish is a disgrace to both of those words. Do you remember that old Chris Rock bit?

Put some water in it, shake it up, mo tussin

This wine tastes like Mo Tussin. Just an mostly empty bottle of Robitussin, filled with water, shaken up.

Why did this have to exist? Tussin wine. Gross.


So, I asked the guy at my local liquor store why all the Georgia wine was so terrible. He had one word for me, “Muscadine.”

This sweet “grape” grows naturally in the south-eastern US, and no where else in the world. That leads us to

2014 Georgia Winery Muscadine

From the Chattanooga Valley, its 100% Muscadine. Yup. 100%

Ok, it took me a minute to figure out how to explain it. All the typical wine stuff is irrelevant. This is like Mike’s Hard Grape Juice.

Have you ever had fruit wines? Strawberry wine, Peach wine, etc. Its not really “wine”

No flavor development. No depth. Nothing that makes you think of wine. Its alcoholic Welch’s. Its easily the worst thing I have had so far.


I am not sure if I will do more Georgia wines…maybe…but man, whew. After this round. God damn it was bad.

Yup…checks out

No major update. Little man was nuts today. Just running around like a crazy baby.

But hey, saw this thing on the road. Feels appropriate for its location.

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Yup

You know what, not going to the website, cause I am sure whatever they are preaching, I aint havin. But, a few thoughts:

  1. Great Slogan. The best slogan.
  2. The whole truck was festooned like this. I feel like all churches should give their faithful a tithe discount if they get their truck decked out like this.
  3. I feel like their logo includes part of the firefox browser logo.
  4. They passed me up. I guess Jesus is pretty cool about speeding.

That is all.

The way she goes boys….

A few housekeeping notes before we get into the blog

  • Heather’s grandmother had a stroke. It…..wasn’t looking good in the first few days…but things have gotten a little better. Sentences, recognition, can walk with a walker. She is going into a stroke rehab facility. She just got out of the hospital yesterday, so she is doing even better now….More news as it develops, but its certainly a serious thing.
  • Today is Heather’s last day at her current job. Feb 1st, starts at the new firm, and we are so stoked.
  • Inspections went well. Everything is all set for the close on Feb. 14th. It cant come soon enough. I’m ready to be in my own place again.
  • Everyone is holding strong in trying times, but its a bit rough now. Family helps. Its definitely good to have plenty of family around.

And now, back to your regularly scheduled programming


I went to the Georgia DMV today. To get a drivers license in Georgia, you need the following:

  1. A Birth Certificate or Passport
  2. A Social Security Card or a W-2
  3. 2 documents proving your place of residence (bank statement, utility bill, etc).

This is frustrating, and I think it is worth mentioning that you are required to have a Georgia Drivers License or ID (which requires the same documentation) to register to vote.


This leads me to a discussion about the body politic in my new home state.

When I told some of my former colleagues in Silicon Valley that I was leaving, I got a very odd question:

“Are you going to be ok in Trumpland? Aren’t you going to be surrounded by religious zealots?”

Id like to break this down in a few pieces. First, oh yeah, plenty of religious people….

The first time I ever came out here, I was evacuating for Hurricane Ivan with two of my Tulane cohort. I was trying to navigate to Heather’s parents house (the house I am in right now). I was lost (this is pre-smart phones, pre-google maps), so I asked her to navigate me to her house. One of her instructions included “now, turn right at the church.”

At that exact moment, I was at an intersection with a church around the corner. I said, “you are going to have to be more specific.”

Second, the religion spread doesn’t necessarily mean that its some sort of cult or Stepford Wives type situation. Lets look at the metric that alot of the internet considers. How did Georgia vote in the last presidential election:

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Plenty of blue yo. Map courtesy of NYT

Immortan Trump won by 5 percentage points. Thats closer than alot of other southern states. In fact, he lost Cobb County (by 2%).

My point being, I think its a horrible idea to throw a Red state in one broad generalization. No one likes being put into a general hole.

I think humanity likes to think of everyone in broad generalizations.

To continue using the modern scale of judgement, I grew up in a county that went 78% to the god-emperor. But, i think people forget, there is  still a fair 12% of people who exist in there. That could include a future me. Or hell, I was definitely a republican when I was turning 18 (cause I actually had religion back then. REAL Greg had religion. FAKE Greg definitely doesn’t believe in a god).

Point is: I hate this idea of Red America and Blue America. Or the Archipelago. Have you seen that thing.

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This is stupid, and I hate it. By this maps recognizing, anyone who voted Democrat in a county that didn’t end up going for Captain Cheetos is in a fucking inner tube floating in the ocean. 

Those are the people I feel for. Cause that was me. I can’t find it at the moment, but I was the only voter in my district in Lafourche parish to vote for Mary Landrieu during one of her terms (can’t recall which now). I was plenty weird, and I felt like an outsider (see also all entries in the previous blog).

But, I digress. I think we are better off remembering that we are all trying to continue the American experiment. And yeah, Trump is doing some completely awful reprehensible shit. But we have mechanisms for that. Plenty of people are already suing. We have already had one of the greatest demonstrations of our time. Keep that shit up.

Just remember three things:

  1. Remember, there are plenty of people who are adrift in that Red State ocean because that’s home, that’s where they were born, that’s where they want to be, or they don’t have anywhere else to go.
  2. Not every Trump voter is a demon. Believe it. Some of them are plenty weird (and not in a bad way, look at REAL Greg).
  3. Don’t do stupid shit like this. Anyone who things seceding is a good fucking plan clearly has no appreciation for history  and is most definitely not prepared at all for what the consequences are.

I’ll leave you all with this thought. These were the words Jimmy Carter wrote as a message to anyone who intercepted Voyager 1.

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Don’t screw up the second to last sentence.

I thought this was REAL America? Where’s my liquor? – On Liquor Laws

Editors note: I was supposed to be at a big thing last night in Atlanta, but a family emergency cropped up. Heather, myself, and Ethan are fine, but just an FYI. An update on this later this week as things evolve. 


Lets talk about liquor.

I love the liquor. Its awesome. I dont think I love it as much as Lahey, but close:

So, the switch to Georgia is interesting. They have some really strange liquor laws. I have grievances with all of it, but lets cover my biggest two issues:

  • No liquor purchased in stores or restaurants on Sunday till 12:30pm
  • Hard liquor has to be purchased in a liquor/package store.

God damn. What the fuck?

So this is messed up on multiple levels. For one thing. No Brunch. This is apparently a sticking point to some people, and legislative arguments have happened to this point.

In addition to the weird sunday liquor law, my bigger axe to grind is the second one? Why, cause I cant get my cheap all day drink.

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Nectar of the Gods.

Thats right. Trader Joe’s 10 year old single malt. The best $20 a bottle scotch you will have in your life. Trust me, this doesn’t hold a candle to Talisker or Oban, but if you need an all day drunk, this will fit the bill.

But NOOOOOO, the State of Georgia doesn’t allow Trader Joe’s to carry the best liquor in the world. Cause of dumb dumb reasons that I couldn’t figure out until recently. I thought this was REAL America???? My freedom is being stepped on for the sake of what? Religion? Screw that. I wants my drinkin swish.

I highly suggest reading the article I previously linked above. Who is this Faith Based Community. Cause as far as I can tell, the cats that go to these liquor stores I am relegated to are the same clowns givin it up to jeewhiz every Sunday at church.

Bill Cowsert, I do not believe you. And, i now have a political mission. I will vote for any candidate willing to overturn all of Georgia’s liquor laws so I can get my scotch back.

Also, that cat represents Athens…what the hell. Got some strong drunks over there. You cant vote that fool out and get the liquor going free and clear?????

So its up to you future politicians. You get my vote for letting me get my drink on.

Lets Make Georgia Drunk Again.

We will go to the WESTCHESTER, have a nice cold pint, and wait for all this all to blow over

Too much to update. As is consistent with everything in Freedom 17. Life moves really fast.

My wife got a job, and put in her two weeks at her former employer. To make that story as short as I can, she was able to get a sitdown with one of the named partners at a regional (but Atlanta based) law firm. 40 lawyers in total. The size she was looking for. They needed trial experience. She has tons. And so, kismet.

Sometimes life happens that way.

So cut to friday. She puts in her notice, we are going to this steakhouse in Marietta to celebrate. We get there, and Heather tells me to look at this one listing that just came on the market. I see this picture

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And my immediate reaction is, thats exactly the type of kitchen Heather has been looking for.

We had planned with our realtor to go see more houses on Saturday (we had seen 5 the previous weekend). And so we asked to add this one.

We ended up seeing 7 houses on saturday. The house of the aforementioned picture was the 6th house.

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Ill have more pictures later. Because the house had JUST gotten on the market, the pictures hadn’t even hit Zillow or Redfin yet. In fact, they just got the sign up. However, there was something odd about the sign.

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That is Hugh’s Personal Private Lot

I didn’t notice it at first. I turned to heather and asked if I should tag it to say “Yuge” private lot. And she goes, “That doesn’t say huge in the first place…”

Sure enough, a typo. Sotheby’s your better than that.

But the house is incredible. They gutted it and did a full renovation in 2016. It looks totally different than when it was originally built. If you were to look up the address on Zillow, you would find pictures almost a decade old and the house looks awful.

We took one step in and was like “Well this is it. Search is over.”

We put in an offer that afternoon, they accepted by 11am today.

There is still inspections and stuff to go through, but we are excited.

The house is in a neighborhood called Westchester. Its close enough to Winchester that it reminded us both of this:

And I think thats part of the Freedom 17 plan. We get this house in Westchester. Have a pint, and wait for this whole thing to blow over.

Sounds like a good deal to me.


I originally had a post about liquor laws, and I have some more Georgia Wine reviews coming up, so stay tuned. For now, feeling good.

Digging the demons out – An Ice Update

We spent the day snowed in on Saturday. Road completely blocked out.

Of course, come sunday we were a) getting antsy and b) needed to go see prospective houses for us to buy.

The one problem is, there is a steep hill heading out of the neighborhood. Its the hill from this picture

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Ill take a better picture but what you cant see heading up that hill in the distance is that its heavily shaded by the trees. So thats a sheet of straight ice heading up there.

In an effort to get us the hell out of there, myself and two other members of the neighborhood got out in the street with flat shovels and spent about an hour and half breaking up ice.

We had a few empty spots heading up the hill from people’s vehicles parked, so we were able to carve out a path.

The other guy my age on the street managed to take the hill with a minivan, so I took the hill with the Lucerne parked out front.

I sweated like a monster but we got out. Not sure what this means for tomorrow, considering a ton of stuff has to get done (repairing the damage on the Prius mentioned two posts back, people needing to go to work, etc).

I suppose we will find out tomorrow, but I think my big takeaway from today was the effor the street took to make their lanes passable. I think its that kind of “all for one”-ness that I missed in my various travels. Its nice to have neighbors I guess is what I am saying.

More news on the thawing of Atlanta tomorrow. And If I am out there scraping again, Ill get a pic or two.